Ways NOT to ask someone to dance

Problematic Social Actions on the Swing Dance Floor #345

Ways NOT to ask someone to dance:

A) Approach them from behind while they’re having a conversation with someone else. Tap them on the shoulder and then stare at them until they stop talking to their friend. Then, assume they know it means that you’ve asked them to dance. If they don’t get it, proceed to B or D.
B) Blindly grab their hand and drag them onto the dance floor.
C) Follow them to the bathroom door, and ask them to dance as soon as they exit.
D) Walk up to them, put out both of your hands face up, but don’t look them in the eye. Shuffle slightly to the music.
E) Wipe your nose with your hand after sneezing, and then offer them the same hand.
F) Do Solo Charleston in front of of your target, especially in slow motion to a groovy song.

These infringements on personal space and sanity have happened to all of us. Common sense, people! When asking someone to go to the movies with you, you don’t just walk up to them outside a movie theater and point at the popcorn. You ask them if they want to go to the movies. If they don’t happen to like the particular movie that’s playing, they might not want to go in. Likewise, if they are having Mojitos with some friends next door, they probably don’t want to close out their tab right then just to go to the movies with you, unless you are a much better friend than the people with whom they are sharing drinks.

So, asking someone to dance is like asking someone to the movies. They might not like the song that is playing, they might not be in the mood, or they might be enjoying talking with their friends right then. They might say, “no.” That’s ok, too. Either way, it is imperative that you ask. And unless you can’t talk (this is a valid excuse), “asking” involves using your vocal chords.

Follow up: Does this “rule” of actually asking someone to dance apply to friends?

A) Unless you have some secret Ninja code or are Professor Xavier, then yes. It applies to friends. Girls and guys both like being truly asked. It shows them respect and gives them an option to say whether or not they really want to dance. Also, whom you might think is a “good friend” of yours might not feel the same way about you. Better safe then sorry. Especially if they are a Ninja.

–on a side note–

I wrote this post originally after an experience with an A-D combo (from above). But, after going out this weekend, I was particularly surprised at how well people were asking each other onto the dance floor. Four stars and two thumbs up, good fun all around.

–DS